Memoir - Greeting Cards !!!

We went on shopping for Greeting Cards during festive seasons. While toddlers looked around for colorful and ornate cards, elders in the house had their own agenda. “Mr. Mishra is not that close to us, a 3 Re. card will be more than enough. Ahh!!! This looks good for my sister-in-law. Let us hope they don’t beat us this time – in prettiness and cost”. 

And once this tiresome shopping was done, we all sat around the drawing table. The chosen one with the best handwriting was in charge of writing down addresses on envelopes and giving personal touch to the cards –

           ‘Dear abc… 

                   
                 Followed by printed beautiful wishes

                             
                                   Yours: 

                                   Mr. Potter & family’

Someone would struck-off costs from the back of the card. Once that was done, we all pitched in to stick stamps and seal 50 odd envelopes. Cards were ready to be posted, on to their mysterious journey.

Then there was a long wait...

Greeting cards would pour in random order – 1 per day, some times 2 to 5. 

We read them all. The ones from very close relatives, were subject to more scrutiny, ‘we read between lines’. Once the festive season was over, we sorted out best cards from the lot, glued their corners and hung it on either side of doors and windows. That part was called 'Interior Decoration'.

After that.... hmmm... we looked forward to the next festive season…

Early Morning Tea

In P.G. Wodehouse's early works, which related to school stories, brewing tea at the study used to set nice plots for pleasant chitchats. I wonder, whether brewing tea is that significant in English culture? I have my own list of special tea – Ginger tea, Cardamom Tea, Masala Tea, Paal Chaaya (more Milk than tea), Strong (Kadak) Tea, Black Tea, Black Tea with Lemon … and the list goes on and on. But nothing can beat a hot cup of tea by your bedside when you wake up early in the morning…

Down the memory lane : Punctuality…

During my schooldays, the bus stop, from where we boarded the school bus (or Coach), was right next to Air Force Main Gate. Our buses came at around 7.00 am and we used to reach the bus stop as early as 6.30 am to keep our bags in line, a typical ‘First Come - Get Seat’ system. On their way to work, some Airmen (Uncle Ji) brought their kid’s school bags with them, in order to keep the bags in line. My dad never did that for me and being a late packer, I couldn’t afford that luxury. So there were around 40 bags, with no owners, and few of us, ‘early birds’, standing at the bus stop, busy chit chatting.

The Air Force siren used to go off exactly at 6.45 am and it lasted for half a minute. It was fun to watch those 30 seconds high speed cycling. A race to get inside the Main Gate before the siren ends. I have hardly seen anyone getting inside those big gates, after the siren gets over. They were real ‘Men in Blue’, they were all punctual. 

Dad often told me the story of a Japanese guy, who succumbed to heart attack when he realized that he reached office 5 minutes late. During mock drills and black outs, Dad told me that he is supposed to leave for work in whatever state he is and in whatever dress he is, if the siren goes off. Though I have never seen him going to work in Pajamas, but he literally jumped out of the window whenever he heard a siren, no matter what time of the day it was.

Thanks to my dad and thanks to those Men in Blue… I have always tried be punctual…

Harry Potter

Marilyn Monroe

Worried About Blank Surname in Passport ??

Just writing down my experience :-

I went to Trivandrum passport office. There were shops/agents who fill the online form. Even though they say we don't need any address proof for Re-issue of passport, just keep 3 address proofs with you.
The documents I carried :
1. Application stating I want to split my name and the application should be considered for Tatkal
2. Print out of online form.

>I took the token for Tatkal and waited for 4+hrs.
>Submitted my documents at the Tatkal counter.
>The person at the counter asked me to get my application approved from the Passport officer.
>We need to convince the officer that it is a 'Tatkal' case.
>Once he approves your application, submit the money (Rs. 2500 I guess) at the above mentioned counter.
>You will get a tracking number. The new passport will reach your home in 3-4 working days.

At passport offices 'Patience' is the key ... :)

PS: Earlier there was an option where the Passport officer would jolt down on the last page of the passport that XYZ's first name and last name to be considered as XY and Z. I am not sure whether that option is still available at Passport offices. If it is available then the entire proces will take only 1 day as you won't need any new passport.

The expression says it all...

Pencil Drawing..

Increased Saturation using ColorSync Utility (Mac) ....

The Gods Must Be Crazy

I know.. 5 years from now, I will read this and laugh.. :)

MS in US....After you get the admits from Universities, you need to submit financial documents in order to release I-20 documents from the college. You need I-20 document for bank loan and VISA interview. Financial documents should be equivalent to I-20 amount. I-20 amount usually covers your tuition fee and other expenses. Financial documents can be - a bank statement, a bank loan approved letter, solvency certificate from bank (liquid + fixed asset), eligible for bank loan letter etc.

Here is my struggle to get the financial documents ready.
Story till now: On Public demand ;)

1. SBT (State bank of Travancore): Tried to convince the manager for half an hour in order to get solvency certificate. He made me listen to his crap fundas. At one point he asked me, ‘From where did you get the information on Banks issuing solvency certificate’? When I told him about Internet & forums, he compared you guys with those who spam mailboxes with 'Won Million Dollar lucky draw' mails and asked me to not to believe you. Phew!!!

I showed him the solvency certificate template and pointed out the statement, which says, ‘However, the certificate does not amount to a commitment on our part of release of exchange from India and does not constitute statement of liability on the part of the bank.’ He said, 'Even a cigarette packet comes with ‘Warning’ message, but that doesn’t mean that cigarette companies are not liable for the harmful effect on human body'.

PS: If you are trying to make out any sense here, I would suggest - Just leave it and continue reading.


2. ICICI Bank: Really liked the way they treated an old customer. They tried their best. At one point they even said, ‘Oh!! You folks only designed Finacle. Don’t you have any menu option for Solvency certificate’. I gave a sheepish smile.

Crux: ICICI won't give solvency certificate. They said they could give something similar to a bank statement.


3. I went to HDFC to enquire about bank loan, so that I can at least get a letter from them saying 'XYZ is eligible for educational loan for USDXXX, if he gets admission from university in US'. But that was in vain.

Stupid Kerala govt. policy - One can get educational loan only from banks in his/her ‘ward’. And there is only one State Bank of Travancore (SBT) in my ward. And no prizes for guessing which is that 'my precious' SBT…

Yes!!! You read it right… No other banks – Public or Pvt. can give me loan.



4. Went back to SBT (same place... same manager… same chair... same table.. err.. Wait a minute… Yeah-New Fundas!!!)



Hold on to your seats as this is going to be a long ride….

A summary of our conversation:

Me (with a smiling face under stress, something your learn while working at client location): I am not here for solvency certificate Sir. I heard about the Kerala Govt. policy: Ward – Bank mapping, and it seems only this SBT can issue educational loan to the ward where I live.

Manager: Ok

Me: I am looking for a loan of Rs.20 Lakh for higher studies in US

Manager: But the maximum limit is 10 Lakh

Me: Sir, I enquired with HDFC and Federal bank, they said their maximum limit is 20 Lakh for abroad education. I don't know why it Rs. 10 Lakh for State Bank.

Manager: Rubbish!! All the banks follow same RBI rules. It is 10 Lakh.

Me: Can you please check? As far as I know HDFC and Federal bank's upper limit is 20 Lakh.



Manager types something on his computer system for 5 minutes. He then looks at me and smirks, ‘I guess you would have already checked State Bank Loan limit on Internet’.

I don’t know whether that was a pun, poking old wound or not. But I didn’t mind it. I just let it go.

Still keeping my WTH CRR2!!! smiling face, ’No sir, I didn’t check State bank’s rate on internet’.



The manager leaves his desk and checks with his assistant, and comes back to confirms that I was right, ‘I think the policy changed in last couple of months. It is Rs.20 Lakhs now’.

Me: Oh, that’s great (my ‘WTH On The SPOT Award’ Pseudo Surprised/excited face). Can you give me an eligibility letter, stating, ‘I am eligible for Rs.20 Lakh bank loan if I get admission from university in US’.

Manager: I can’t do that straight away. First you need to submit an application for educational loan. I need to check your collateral (fair point). If you are keeping your property as collateral, then you need to give me the plan/sketches of your land and house, your land papers, details of the university where you are applying, the fees structure and many such things. We will then send it to regional office, as we don’t verify these documents here. Someone from regional office will come and visit you to verify the details. A lawyer will be appointed to check the validity of your papers. And if they find any smudge, then they will reject your educational loan application.

So NO WAY!! I can say you are eligible for educational loan now!!!



Me: Sir, you said with the application I need to submit college admission documents and fees structure of the course. But I will get those documents only after I submit the financial documents to the university. For which I need the eligibility letter.

Manager: Sorry I can’t give you that.



*After a while



Manager: Don’t we have good colleges offering MIS course in India.

Me (with expression similar to the one which you settles into, when after two hours of marathon WTH-WTF conversation with your teammates in a meeting, your PM gets up and starts talking bullshit. And you need to show that you are really interested) I guess we do. But most colleges cover the topics under MBA curriculum.

*I understand some of you might disagree with me here. But I am more interested in the functional/management topics of MIS.



Manager : Ahh!! There is one good college in Bangalore.. I don’t remember the name..

Me : IIM?



Manager : No no.. this one is famous

Me : IISc



Manager : Naah… Chris…..

Me: Chris* **llege?



Manager: Yeah.. That’s the one. Heard they have 5 rounds of selection itself. My relative’s son got admission there.

Me : Oh ok. Even my (retard) cousin got admission there. Heard all they need is a huge donation/fees ..around 8 lakhs Rs…



Anyway, there was no point in talking to him further. And no point in showing my frustration as ‘that is the only BANK in Kerala which can give me educational Loan. And I will have to meet him a thousand times, before I get a penny!!!’



----------

PS: HDFC Credilla (outside Kerala) is willing to give Education loan without any collateral. The amount depends on the college. It is easy to get 'Loan Sanction Letter' from them and you can show that to get I-20.

Vamos Rafa !!!

Pencil Drawing + Color saturation

Vito Andolini Corleone (The Godfather II)

For Your Eyes Only..

Johnny Depp

Achan.. Dad..

Smoking...

The Moon

Pencil - 2H, HB, 4B, 6B, 8B; Charcoal, Ash, Whitener

Thanks to you.. we are safe...

I was reading one article on 26^th November incident, when US helicopters attacked Pak base and killed Pakistani soldiers. My condolences are with the victims’ family and dear ones. http://www.thehindu.com/opinion/lead/article2689765.ece

The article goes onto say: Questions are being raised as to why the Air Force was not called in that night to counter the attack, but the DGMO indicated that this would have “escalated the scale of the incident.” Also, given the disparity between Pakistan's military prowess and the combined strength of the NATO forces, a political response was preferred — though the civilian leadership was informed about the incident only after daybreak.

------- -------

This reminded me of an incident that took place way back in 2000, when I was studying in Xth standard. It was a Sunday afternoon when my uncle, who is an airman, took me to Air Traffic Control (ATC) tower in Amritsar.

Rajasansi airport in Amritsar is used by both civil and defense aircrafts.Since I was with a defense personnel, getting access to the ATC tower was not much difficult. As soon as we entered the control room, we saw lots of activities going on in the small glass walled room. For a small Airport of the size Rajasansi, where there were not many international and domestic flights, this was unusual. I kept quiet as the drama unveiled in front of me.

The chief was shouting at his sub-ordinates, ‘Ask him to take XYZ route’ and the message was aptly delivered through a microphone. I had never heard of the place which ‘The chief’ had mentioned, later I realized that it was a code. The sub-ordinate spoke to the pilot again and relayed the message back to ‘The chief’, ‘He says everything is fine now. We will be able to see him in couple of minutes’. Meanwhile my uncle went and spoke to his Air force counterparts. He came back and suggested that we should better go outside as something critical was going on. As soon as we came out of the room, I asked him the details. He said, ‘There is this Uzbek cargo flight, which is coming to India after a long gap. The pilot is not sure of the route. As soon as he diverted from the route, he got tailed by 2 MiGs, which took off from Pathankot. Everything seems to be sorted out now and we will be able to see this flight soon.’

As soon as we reached the ground floor, I could see the pilot of the Uzbek aircraft coming in from the runway. A tense looking fat guy in mid-50s. He was narrating the incident to the people who were walking alongside him. His face was animated and he was gesturing the MiGs with his palms, which were shivering.

My uncle asked me whether I would like to see the Aircraft and soon I found myself standing beneath the humongous Uzbek machine. While standing there I recollected the pilot’s tense face in my mind who flew that machine a while ago and who was made to say all his prayers by our alert Indian Air Force…'Thanks to you.. we are safe...'

Short Story

03-Dec-2011

The Bicycle Thief

A hot summer afternoon in the month of May. Shopkeepers had closed their shops and they had gone home for lunch. There were hardly any human souls on the road. The only shop that stood out in this bland view was ‘Rafique’s Salon’ with a missing ‘o’. The saloon’s board stretched across with the pictures of Indian cricketers and cine stars. Though the pictures can hardly be classified as portraits, nonetheless a good stare can help one identify the immortals. The shop was teeming with customers. Inside the shop, the barber was busy cutting hair and there were least five customers waiting for their turn. One thing was common among the customers (even the person who was getting attended by the barber), once in a while they looked outside the shop to make sure that their bicycles were safe.

Raju was sitting beneath a banyan tree and he looked attentively at the barbershop, which was across the road. He neither belonged to that village nor he was interested to get a haircut. He was interested in the bicycles parked outside the shop. He had calculated the risk and narrowed down on the bicycle, which he would steal. After waiting for sometime, he went to the shop. He opened the door and quickly glanced at the customers. With an air of disappointment he turned towards the barber, ’How much time will it take?’ Barber greeted Raju with a warm smile and like a shrewd mathematician he looked at his customers and calculated, ‘ One… One and half hour Sir’

‘Okay, I will come later’, replied Raju.

Raju closed the door behind him. On the right side of the shop, a bicycle was kept slanted to the shop’s wall. There was no lock on that bicycle. Raju took that bicycle and rode away with it at a normal speed. After riding the bicycle for a good five minutes, he looked carefully at the bicycle’s machine. In the bright sunshine, he could easily see those silver letters inscribed on the machine. He ran his fingers over the letters, which said ‘Rafique’

Like an artist, who was satisfied with his work, Raju looked pleased with his current possession. He rang the bicycle bell and said to himself, ‘ One... One and half hour ’

------- -------