Short Story

"Can we kill our self by holding our breath?..."

They were sitting at CCD, when Raj asked this question to Sneha.

Sneha was one of the most brilliant and charming girls that Raj ever came across in his life. On the contrary, Raj was a not so brilliant-stupid guy. They say unlike charges attract each other and something similar happened in their life and they got married.

Raj never won when ever he indulged in a debate with Sneha. She always had some logic behind her answers that Raj had to accept. The giggle and laughter at the end of these battles drove him crazy.You can call it 'Male Ego' or madness, Raj wanted to prove Sneha wrong at least on one ocassion.

"What?"

Raj asked her again, "Can we kill our self by holding our breath?"

"No. Never"

Raj became curious, "how can you say that?"

"I said No... means No"

"There will be some explanation!!!"

"Ok. In simple words...After holding your breath for a certain amount of time, the nervous system will stimulate a reaction which you won't be able to control. Your brain cells will send across a message to respire"

Raj got more confused, "I don't think so. You are wrong this time"

Sneha, "Okay so what is your explanation....Come on tell me..."

Raj was silent. He kept looking at Sneha.

"Oh come on. You can't make a statement just like that. Without any proof"

Raj didn't reply and Sneha became more worried than furious, "Raj whats' going on? Say something please"

Raj kept staring at her. He was mum.

"Oh dear..Are you holding your breath"
"Okay go ahead. I know you will breath again"

Raj didn't say anything.He had a smile on his face.

"Oh please Raj. Come on. Don't be an idiot. Please.."

It had been more than 1 minute and Raj was still holding his breath...

Her eyes were brimming with tears..."Please Raj. I beg you. Please".
"Okay you won...for Gods' sake..start breathing"

Raj knew, if he will breathe, he will lose again!!!

Jokes (Title not yet decided)

Even though the fart joke from ancient Sumerian civilization in 1900 BC is believed to be the worlds' oldest joke, I think jokes were there even before the creation of earth.I don't have any evidences to prove that my theories are correct, but in todays' world who cares for evidences. You just need some media hype and you need to repeat a sentence 1000 times on television. There you go - 100 billion people thinking "Why is he saying such a simple fact daily on television?"

Creation of Earth

God *Dobrek was playing GODS in his Atari ST personal computer. For 400 years he was stuck on level 3 of the game. Level 3 was very tough and Dobrek was fed up with the machines' performance. Finally he decided to take a P break.

The best of ideas come to ones mind while emptying stomach. After an year, 'The' idea stuck him - "I should create a real game. A game with no levels and plenty of players. Players who will worship me as the ultimate power." He finished his job and got back to his workstation with this new project. Meanwhile water level in the planet 'Pusho', increased upto 400m because of unprecedented rainfall for continuous one year. Next time when your mom says not to go outside during rain, she really means it.

Dobrek, who learned civil engineering using e-books and Xeroxed version of original books, started looking at his earlier work - 'The Universe'. He admired his work for 2 years. Then he started looking for a space. "No not there.There I do my asteroidical experiments. Nope. There I go for walk. I need free space there. I do my push ups there. Not Possible". Finally he got a perfect area for his new project. "Aha, 'Pusho'. I have always neglected this cute little sphere. I will play my game here. Oh God!! okay that is me.... it is full of water. I will have to do lot of work here. At least 88 million person work per year for 4.54 billion years."

He started off with his works. Years went by. He hardly took any break. Meanwhile other planets faced drought situation. Planets which were about to have life on them through the well known scientific method of slow and steady evolution of unicellular-multicellular-mean mammals, got affected.

Dobrek finished of his job in time and finally said to himself -"Aha!! Its' almost ready. Now it's time to create my players."

-- To be continued

--*Author believes in only one religion and that is "Matfenk" and one God -"Dobrek". Whenever he gets stuck in a meeting or session, he prays to Dobrek and the very next moment he gets a break.